Carlos Danger and Geraldo Don’t Do Salads

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Carlos Danger/Anthony Weiner sends dick pics.

Geraldo posted a topless pic. He later apologized saying, “I was drunk and lonely.”

Aren’t we all Geraldo? Aren’t we all.

As a slew of stories come out of public figures sending pics of themselves, let’s take a moment to acknowledge the true purpose of having a camera phone. Gratuitous food closeups.

Last night’s salad featured almost every ingredient from the produce department: romaine, spinach, avocado, red onion, red bell pepper, grilled green beans. Add marinated, grilled chicken, quinoa, and chunks of pepper jack cheese. If that weren’t enough, I topped it all with fresh salsa verde.

I also noticed “fat free” on my bag of spinach. Are people really on the fence? “I don’t know about this green shit. Is it healthy?”

Sadly this salad has yet to receive the same attention as a congressional dick.